The Groom

Twenty-five Things about Dave (by Dave)

1.  I am a Getting Things Done cultist.  Nothing goes on my To-Do list unless it is actionable!  I have a bad memory and generally will forget things if I don't write them down.

2.  I cannot bring myself to breathe through a snorkel.

3.  I am only evenly divisible by 1 and myself!

4.  I have to rewrite several times to achieve intelligibility.  Then I have to rewrite again to get rid of the more stupid ideas.

5.  My favorite moons are Ensaladus, Triton, Mimas, Ganymede, Charon, Phobos, and Earth's Moon.

6.  I enjoy refering to ice as "water ice."

7.  My land-speed record for solving the Rubix Cube is 2 minutes and 5 seconds.  As a kid, my average was about 3 minutes.  Now, I usually have to cheat and use the internet.

8.  I love Japan and most things from Japan.  I am however confused about the nature of Pokémon.  Is there one Pokémon named Pikachu, or is Pikachu a species of Pokémon?  If the later, is that species made up of individuals with different names and genders?  How intelligent are Pokémon?  Do they consider themselves captives, and, if so, are they upset about their captivity?

9.  I work hard to minimize my impact on the environment.  I believe that our decisions about what to buy, ride, and eat have consequences.  So I walk and bike wherever I can.  I love riding my bicycle and hope I never have to go back to a long car commute, although I confess I do enjoy driving our 2010 Toyota Prius.  I also recycle and try to minimize my consumption of beef.

10.  My awesome fiancée stood in line for three hours in the freezing cold to get me a Nintendo Wii.  She certainly is the Mario to my Princess Peach.

11.  I don't think there is life on Mars.  Please wait 24 hours before you claim otherwise outside of a peer-reviewed journal.

12.  Yes, I do want anchovies on my pizza!

13.  I keep a hand towel tucked into my bike pack just in case the Vogons show up.

14.  I buy more jam, honey, and apple butter than I really need.

15.  I am really, really glad Barack Obama is President of the United States.  Making a small contribution towards his election has been one of the two highlights of my career.  The other was working on software used to aid law enforcement in the investigation and prosecution of violent crimes.

16.  My favorite food is lobster.

17.  It's a beautiful day!  Stop wasting time on the Internet and go outside!

18.  Why are there still fax machines?  Faxes make me want to cultivate a handlebar mustache and get one of those bicycles with an enormous front wheel.

19.  I think we have too much faith in the Academy.  It isn't just that so much of what I learned in school ultimately turned out to be wrong (Emily Dickenson wasn't a loveless recluse, Lewis dot diagrams have no fundamental physical significance, etc.), so much as that it was--for the most part--conveyed mechanically, without any invitation to challenge or dig deeper.  Increasingly, it seems to me like college is primarily a mechanism for transmitting status from one generation to the next.  A real education lasts your whole lifetime.  These days, I learn a lot from books.  I love to order slightly out-of-date textbooks over the Internet.  They're often discounted by a factor of thirty, and the information is still good.  I read slowly.  I am impressed by the number of books my fiancée reads, and the swiftness with which she reads them.

  I often have difficulty deciding between waffles or pancakes.  So I was understandably delighted, on a recent trip to San Francisco, to be served a hybrid pancake waffle (pancaffle?) at the Olympic Cafe.  I love ihop, but am puzzled by the unavailability of maple syrup there.

21.  The more I learn, the more acutely I sense just how limited my understanding of the world is.

22.  My strategy for MONOPOLY is to buy everything you land on, trade to obtain the light purples or oranges, build them up, and use the proceeds to finance monopolies on the reds and yellows.  Railroads and light blues are worth purchasing from other players, at the right price.

23.  I love maps.  My favorite thing on my iPhone is the Maps app.

24.  Because of my concern that the breed standard is ultimately harmful to dogs, I am conflicted about my fondness for Boston Terriers and Pugs.

25.  Like my bro and fellow Cornellian Andy Bernard, I am a enthusiastic disc golf player.